maybe you wanted to know...

the story behind the adoption (Lord, willing) of our 4^th Chinese treasure…

I just realized a few weeks ago that I really never told the story of Aubrie.  I’ve given a few scattered details here and there, but I really feel that this story should be told – all the glory to God for what he has done to bring us another daughter…

It was almost 4 years and 4 months ago that our family of four found ourselves on the other side of the world – taking a tiny, precious 25 month old into our forever family.  On one hand, that seems so long ago; on the other hand, I remember it like it was yesterday.

The week we got Amy, we were given the opportunity to travel about 3 ½ hours to Yangjiang City Social Welfare Institute – Amy’s home for all those months. 

I don’t think we were really prepared for the experience.  I mean – honestly – we visited so that Amy could have closure to her life there.  How foolish for us to think that *that* was all the visit was about.

When we arrived, we were warmly welcomed by the director, staff and ayi’s (nannies).  We got a brief tour of the office area and then we were invited to visit the baby room.

I will never, ever forget the baby room.

Absolutely quiet – aside from our own voices.

The room was filled with babies and toddlers; all rocking back and forth.  The scene replays in my mind often…

After a few minutes with the younger children, we were offered the opportunity to go to the courtyard and visit with some of the older children that Amy spent most of her days with.

There was a young girl and an older boy – sitting together.

I asked the director about them and was told that they both had only recently been abandoned.  Since they came to the orphanage at about the same time, they naturally partnered together – kind of like a brother and sister.

That beautiful, precious girl.

I was so drawn to her.

I met a little girl whose family was waiting to travel – and we took quite a few pictures, but I was very much wanting to move onto this little girl.  I wanted to talk with her.

I went to her and knelt down in front of her.  She slipped her right arm through the arm of her friend.  She has a little purse over her left shoulder.  She showed me what was in it: a paper and a comb.  She smiled – shyly – as I told her how pretty her hair was and that she was very lucky to have her friend with her, to be her “brother” and protector.

One by one, each member of our family took turns engaging this *one* little girl… 

Chris took an up-close picture of her.  

Austin shared a snack with her. 

Ashleigh sat and “talked” with her. 

Undeniable: this little girl made an impression on us all.

We left the orphanage to return to Guangzhou, but that little girl just consumed my thoughts.

I told Chris that I wanted her to be our daughter and that if I could, I would take her that day.

I went back to our hotel and shared on the our Yahoo group for our orphanage about our visit.  And about this little girl.  I posted her picture and said I wanted to have her as my daughter.

I can say with all honestly that nearly every week since we were there, I have thought of that little girl.  Her face has been one of the driving forces behind so many changes in our life in the past year…

So.

Fast forward to December of last year.

I should start this little “part” of the story with this disclaimer: we really weren’t intending to adopt again – at least not any time soon.  And we were NOT adopting an older child.  I said that.  I’m not sure I really believed it, but that might just be my coping skills.  Seriously?  Who sets out to adopt 4 times in 4 ½ years?!?!?

Chris and I were in Florida; just the two of us.  We left our kids in the very capable hands of our dear friends.  It just so happened that the day we left for Florida, they got “the call” about their precious little Ethiopian baby boy!!!  Chris and I spent our first night almost constantly looking at the picture of their baby on my Bl@acberry!  We were soooooo happy that it was finally THEIR turn!

Not only were we in Florida, but we were also at the happiest place on Earth: D!sney!!!   We set out the next day for a two-park hopping afternoon.

 I don’t think I will ever forget the next part, as long as I live…

I was checking F@cebook (because that’s what I do when I am at D!sney!) when I saw my friend Lisa’s status: I’m going to start losing sleep if I don’t find a family for an 8 year old girl and a 6 year old boy from my daughters’ orphanage.

That’s really great of her, huh?  Trying to help find a family for a few kids from her daughters’ orphanage?  Except – that’s how I know Lisa.  She has two daughters from Amy’s orphanage.

I read it to Chris and said “uh - oh”.

I asked what I should do.  He said “ask her who it is.”

I messaged Lisa and said “uh - oh.  Who is it???”

She messaged back immediately and said “it’s the girl from your pictures!”

Uh-oh.

And then, in the middle of D!sney… it was quiet.

For a long time.

We both felt pretty blindsided.

(Oh, I forgot that part.  We both watched “The Blindside” the week before.  I left that theater and KNEW.  I honestly think that is why I said “We are not adopting again – and we are NOT adopting an older child.”  I think God was using that movie to prepare my heart; our hearts.)

We tried to be very practical and logical about this.  Just because she was available did NOT mean we were supposed to adopt her.  We would pray about this.

But, we were both thinking to ourselves – a lot.

We went home the next day.  That night, I pulled up her file on my computer. 

We knew – from previous covert ops – that we can NOT hide things like this from our two big kids.  They are sneaky and we are not sneaky ENOUGH!  So, we told them she was available and that we were praying.  Their response?  “We’re adopting her, right?!”  We told them that we were praying about it, but weren’t sure if we should adopt her or just advocate for her to have a family…

They knew.

I think we all knew.

But, true to our word, we prayed.

A lot of my early prayers sounded something like this: God.  Please don’t ask us to do this.  We’re done, remember?

Every time I prayed that prayer – with the accompanying excuses – God would respond with “my grace is enough.” 

Every time.

I think I knew by Wednesday of that week that this was our daughter.  I just had that peace.  Not the peace that says “everything will be perfect!” but the peace that this was from God, of God and through God.

By Saturday morning, we were both fully committed to making this little girl our daughter.

I still can’t really believe this is happening.  Not the “adopting again” part, but the “I really get to be her mom – in God’s perfect timing – finally” part.  He could have chosen a different “mama” and “baba” for Aubrie, but He didn’t.  He could have asked us to adopt a different, older child, but He didn’t.  He asked us to adopt the ONE older girl that He *knew* we couldn’t say “no” to.

Comments

[The McMurphys]

I don't know why I am always amazed at how God works in adoptions. He is God after all! Let's get this girl home!

[Gail]

Beautiful.

Got chills reading it, the same as I did when you first told me.

We serve an incredible God.

[Anna Freeland]

Oh man! Beautiful story!!!! So happy for you!
I didn't know you took your older kids to China with you to get Amy. Is that the only time they went?
We have debated about taking Austin and Naomi...Any words of wisdom?

[amy j.]

What a special story you will have to tell Aubrie someday!

[Debby Graber]

Have you heard if the boy has found a family?

[Tami]

I haven't seen that he was placed with a family :( It has only been recently that orphanages have been willing to start adoption paperwork for older children. From what we knew about this boy, he was also mentally challenged (or whatever the PC words are), which is another strike against the orphanage preparing his paperwork. Sadly, he has probably already aged out (14 years old) and now has no hope to be adopted. I will try to post his picture soon, so that we can have a face to pray for.

[Tami]

Oh, Debby! I just realized that you were probably asking about the 6 year old boy?! YES!!! His family almost has their dossier ready to send to China and should be traveling near the end of this year or the beginning of next!

[bandksmith@yahoo.com]

I stand in awe of God once again! Why does it surprise me? He orchestrates everything perfectly! We already knew what an incredible trip that was 4 years ago, and we personally saw God's hand in joining all of our families. Wow! Just wow! ...that you would get to meet that precious girl and that He knew the plans He had for her. I already knew part of Aubrie's Story but not all the details. Thank you for sharing from your heart! We look forward to the day that she is home with you, and we get to meet her in person!
Love ya
Kim

[Lindsey]

Thank you for sharing. I DID want to know. Absolutely beautiful.